doing it right

When you’re young the word sex and everything about it is funny for some reason. Past the point of puberty, things change pretty quickly. Almost the opposite happens. Cooties and the war against the other gender is what becomes funny. It’s that youthful peer pressure that forces our young souls to become accepting of the other sex, and kissing and all that good stuff isn’t icky anymore. It’s welcomed… because that’s what everyone else is doing.

I never understood how sex and baseball became so alike, but it seemed very sportlike to get to the next base. That’s just what you do, and there’s no questioning it. But that’s only true for the world. When you grow up Christian, it’s a lot different. You’re parents know you’re growing and these things are to come. They want to do their best to keep you clear of the pressures of such things, but don’t want you to rebel and do it anyway at the same time. Same with drugs and all of these other teenage epidemics.

I’m sure it serves the same in a lot of Christian households, but in mine, the law was that sex was to be saved for marriage. Back then, I really couldn’t see why, but the fact that it didn’t seem the same for the world kept me puzzled.

Today looking back on it, I can see for reasons other than religion, it was really a good idea. The negatives of sex are either disease or unwanted pregnancy, or both! In my opinion, sex should serve two purposes: Procreation and Intimacy. The world makes it out to be something recreational or just something to do for fun, or to feel wanted or loved. Procreation and Intimacy should be practiced between lovers. That just how I see it. And who else better to love, than your spouse – whomever you’re married to. That way you’ve had time to be married and prepare yourself for a family. Sex after marriage greatly reduces the risk of disease as well. Promiscuity, or having sex with multiple people is a lot less welcome when you’re married, at least for the faithful. But besides all that, it’s just better to wait.

Now speaking from experience as a teen and a young man in the same, sex is a very powerful tool the devil loves to use. Sexual sin ranges from lust, to masturbation, all the way to fornication. I’m sure a lot of you know what these things are, but to bring us back to elementary: Lust is sexual thoughts; Masturbation is practicing sexual acts alone, and Fornication is having sexual intercourse before marriage (or at least along those lines). Without getting into too much detail, my experiences as a growing boy were haunted by sexual sin on a daily basis making it a struggle for me to live righteously.

At times, I felt the only thing Satan had on me was sexual sin when I was doing everything else right and I began thinking being a Christian was too hard. It was frustrating, depressing, and just a negative experience. I felt weak and very alone at times. Turning to my youth leaders was one of the greatest decisions in the struggle. They let me know that I wasn’t alone at all in my struggle and many people go through the same. Knowing that alone didn’t help me through the struggle though. It just made it somewhat acceptable.

To this day I still struggle with keeping my mind free from sin. I speak for many young men when I say it’s hard. (Ladies, I honestly don’t know how it is with you, but I can only talk what I know… sorry!) The devil is a coward and attacks when you’re most vulnerable, or at your weakest, and uses my weakness against me more than anything.

He under-estimates my strength and desire to please God time and time again however. Things I like to do to keep myself right are:

- Seeking help from God through prayer.

When I know in my heart and soul I’m out to do the right thing and please God, I know and feel God understands my struggle and is more than willing to help me. I pray for strength and guidance from God to aid me in doing the right thing and staying on the right path. I of course seek forgiveness as well. If your hearts in the right place you have to believe he’ll forgive you as long as you’re willing to change.

- Seeking guidance in the Word.

I’ve found relief in the word many times in my bible. When it may seem like you’re not finding what your searching for, that just means you’ve gotta be sure to stay in the word. I never said I found it right away, but I thank God I stayed in the word long enough to be able to benefit from it through my struggle. With that said, a verse that often helps me is 1 Thessalonians 4:3. “It’s God’s will that you keep away from sexual sin as a mark of your devotion to him.” It helps me put God and I in a relationship where falling under the influence of sexual sin is like cheating on him and drives me toward being faithful that much more. I also like to prove my devotion to God through doing so. Other scriptures that help me are in 1 Corinthians. 6:13 says, “The body is not for sexual sin but for the Lord, and the Lord is for the body.” 6:18 speaks on how sexual sin is different from all other sin, and how you sin against your body (God’s Temple) when you fall under sexual sin. I look at that like vandalizing or destroying something precious to God.

- Seeking help from someone you trust.

I’ve turned to many people, on numerous occasions in my youth, like male ministers and even my dad. It may seem very embarrassing talking to someone about things like that but that’s why I said turn to someone you know you can trust. I thought I’d be punished for telling my dad, or looked at differently by my youth leaders, but thankfully that was never the case. Every time they shared their own struggles, or expressed to me that I wasn’t the only one going through it. It’s a very relieving process though. Just be sure your help is from someone who could understand, meaning someone the same sex as you. I think my mom would refer me to me dad if I told her, and it would make for an awkward situation for me to talk to a female minister about such a thing.

But that’s about it for this devotional. Thank you for taking all this time out to listen! I pray this be blessing to your life, should you need it.